Jennifer Chiu
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My mom didn’t tell me this until 40 🤫

My mom didn’t tell me this until 40 🤫

The advice my mom waited to share, the changes no one warned me about, and the moment that caught me off guard

Jennifer Chiu
January 28, 2026

Hi beautiful ☕️

I was at my mom’s house last week…

When she casually asked how I felt about turning 40.

I gave her the chill, “I’m fine with it” answer.

She went quiet.

Then she said, “There are a few things I didn’t tell you yet.”

The first thing out of her mouth stopped me in my tracks. 😳

This week I’m spilling:

🕰️ What my mom was holding out on me
😵‍💫 The weird parts of turning 40 no one tells you
📱 One camera roll moment that had me crying

My mom knew. She just waited until I turned 40 to say it out loud. 💓

My mom kept this from me…

She said…

“If you can’t touch the thermostat without starting a war with your own body…”

Congrats. That’s perimenopause.

I laughed. Then thought, holy sh— that literally happens everyday.

Here are the other things she waited to tell me…and why I’m finally paying attention now:

Thinning skin is real 😬
My skin was thinner and dehydrated. My mom told me this is when skin stops bouncing back and to start building the collagen up again. I start layering this collagen booster serum (on my second bottle), then sealing it in with my anti-aging peptide cream (will lift + firm). This duo gives me plump and glowy skin! Tip: Apply in the AM after cleansing.
Hormonal breakouts don't magically stop at 30 🫠
No one warned me about chin breakouts in your 40s. One showed up before an event (and I’m like whyyy?!). One night with this 345 relief cream and the inflammation was gone. Now I get why over 60K people bought this last month. 🤯 Tip: I use these complexion correction pads before bed and omg…I forgot I even had a breakout.
Vitamin C becomes non-negotiable 🧡
She told me dullness isn't exhaustion…it's cell turnover slowing down. I thought it was just life and kids. I love this squalane + vitamin c rose oil to brighten in the morning and it’s perfect under makeup. Tip: Always apply SPF if you’re using vitamin c. This incredible second skin sunscreen goes on invisible and has SPF 50!
Sagging skin hits different 🌻
Hormone shifts can make skin look flat and saggy, no matter how much you sleep. My mom swears by this pair and has used it for years. The activating essence lotion layered with the vital perfection lift + firm cream is one she truly loves, and now I get why.
Tip: Lotions keep your skin more hydrated.
Fermented ingredients are the secret 🍶
My mom has used fermented essences for decades, and her skin has always looked smooth and hydrated. I used to think it was just fancy water. I was wrong. I’ve been using this black rice toner for years (layer twice under makeup for glass skin!) and when my skin is extra dry I flood my skin in this Korean ginseng essence water.
Tip: Pat it in gently so your skin actually absorbs it.

At least I’m not alone…

After my mom’s talk, I asked you guys what really changed in your 40s.

Your responses made me laugh, feel seen, and slightly panic…in that order.

“I make noises every time I stand up.”
“I can’t eat dairy past 6pm.”
“My knees sound like Rice Krispies.”
“When I sneeze, I either pull a muscle or pee a little.” 😂

Okay cool.
It’s not just me.

Here’s what’s actually helping right now…nothing extreme, just real-life fixes:

• Hot flashes that hit out of nowhere 🔥
One minute I’m fine, the next I’m sweating through a zoom. I basically live in these short sleeve sweaters. Not too hot, still cozy and airy.
Tip: Stay cool with batwing cardigans (remember the grey Aritizia one all the girls had?) I still wear that one.

• Mood swings that make zero sense 😭
From crying at commercials to snapping in 30 seconds flat. This mind + muscle magnesium powder has helped me feel calmer and less reactive.
Tip: Take it about one hour before bed to help your nervous system settle.

• Sleep that refuses to cooperate 💤
My brain suddenly has opinions at 2 a.m. I keep my notebook by my bed and dump every thought out instead of spiraling. I end a lot of my entries with…”You’re a great mom. You got this!” It’s basically free therapy.
Tip: Make a habit of writing down your thoughts and ideas

• Hair thinning no one warned us about 💇‍♀️
Skin thins. Hair thins. No one said a word. Consistency has been everything. Do a DIY ACV rinse once a week (to help clarify hair), apply a hydration mask, and a bonding oil.
Tip: It might sound like a lot but good hair needs TLC, don’t wait until it’s too late!

Three months old in this photo. Five years old in real life. Time is sneaky like that. 🥹

The camera roll moment that broke me…

I was scrolling through my camera roll one night…📱

Just looking for a random photo.

And I landed on one of me holding my son at three months old in our old apartment.

That photo is five years old.

I scrolled forward.

Birthday candles.
Daycare drop-offs.
First day of kindergarten.

Five years disappeared in about 30 seconds ⏳

Everyone says, “It goes so fast.”
When you’re in it, that feels impossible.
The days feel long, loud, exhausting.

But they were right.

I see the changes now.
The lines around my eyes.
The grays I don’t even try to hide.

And for a second, that stings.

But then I see something else.

I see a woman who survived lots of hard moments in motherhood 💪

Who built a business, held a family together, and kept showing up…even when she was running on fumes.

It got me thinking about something my mom said to me… 💭

She said the space between your 30s and 40s is the golden age.

You’re more confident in who you are.
Your kids still think you’re their whole world.
And if you’re lucky, your grandparents are still around.

It’s a rare season where generations overlap ❤️

Work matters.
A clean house is nice.

But none of it matters more than being present.

Because one day they won’t run toward you at pickup.
Or need to hold your hand to cross the street.
And eventually, they’ll stop needing you at bedtime for one more story.

Even writing this makes me teary 🥲

That exhausted version of me holding a baby was barely keeping it together.

This version…lines, grays, and all—is tired… but thriving ✨

So heading into this next chapter…

I’m choosing presence.
More sleep.
More movement.
Less scrolling.

Because five more years are coming either way.

And I want to actually be here for them.

See you next week. 💖